Excerpt from Chapter 25:
We were not surprised. It was bound to happen
and what amazed us was it hadn't been sooner.
Wilfried and I parted company that day. He,
Holder and the driver were detailed salvage work
on the vehicle and the rest of us were split up
for other duties. There were difficulties in
communications with our forward gun positions so
Command Post decided to retain me as one of
their runners. I wasn't too pleased about that
as the expected life span of a runner was pretty
short as a rule.
My job was to relay messages between the Command
Post and three of our guns. One was by the
windmill tower on the road to Chelm. Another was
positioned behind a farm house and was a fair
way out across an open field and the third was
located, of all impossible places, by the
chapel, right in the centre of the cemetery. The
chap who'd had that run before me didn't last
long. He went out one night and never returned.
He was probably ambushed or worse, taken
prisoner and killed. One lonely German soldier -
a bullet in the neck and no witnesses.
The gun at the windmill was closest to the
Command Post but was not easy to reach as two
Russian T34s and a number of Sherman tanks were
on the approaches, more or less permanently
entrenched and well protected by infantry units
dug in. They controlled the area and the road
leading to the tower. The gun at the farm
building could only be reached under cover of
darkness on a track across the open field or,
daytime, via a time-consuming detour through the
town ruins. Time consuming it was because one
could never be sure what part had changed hands
during the night. The eeriest run of all three,
however, was the errand to and from the chapel
in the graveyard.
The cemetery was behind the church, not very far
from the main square. It was surrounded by
something like a 6 foot high, solid brick
perimeter wall and the only safe way for me to
get into it from the town square end was through
a large hole blasted by an artillery shell. I
couldn't use the main gate as this was
controlled by Russian machine gun and sniper
fire.
Once inside, the cemetery was large and
clustered with trees although heavily damaged by
constant shells. Splintered tree tops and
branches made the going pretty tough and it was
very hard to find my way to the chapel in the
dark, especially the first couple of nights.
Grave stones that showed me the way one night
were not there the next, but instead would be a
large hole from a grenade.
Often my entry into the graveyard coincided with
some hefty rounds of artillery and I was more on
my belly than my feet, crawling from one hole to
the next, all the way to the morgue. There was
also a certain apprehension of what the next
hole might reveal, as some of the graves were
quite fresh. The only thing I could be
reasonably sure of was, as long as the Russians
kept their artillery aimed at that part of the
cemetery, the chapel had not changed hands.
On nights that were relatively quiet and free
from incoming shells I had to watch out where I
was going and it was always a relief to see the
chapel, though even then I could never be sure
the occupants hadn't changed. The last 20 or so
metres to their gun position located at the
southern end of the building always took me a
long time so we had a pre-arranged signal, a
short whistle to be answered by the watch at the
gun. Their quarters were under the chapel and
was accessed via a removed flagstone in the
aisle from where wide timber steps led down into
the vault. I didn't feel too comfortable the
first night I got to the bottom of those creaky
steps. The first thing I saw was rows of boxes
neatly stacked on top of each other. Coffins
they were, outlined by the dim flicker of candle
light shining from the gun crews' living corner.
In answer to my inquisitive look I was assured
they were still empty. I wasn't certain but
didn't pursue the matter.
Actually, the run to the morgue carried a bonus
- a small reward for my death-defying feat: I
was given a liberal slurp of Samakhonka to help
me get out of the cemetery with a more
enlightened feeling. They had a good supply of
that poison and I never asked them where they
got it from. It was probably brewed and hidden
in the vault by the previous caretakers,
Ukrainian undertakers. It was brewed from corn
and carbide, or so they said. The stuff was
absolutely lethal, dark blue in colour, like
writing fluid. A tumbler full of that dubious
liquid gave one an elated feeling in a very
short time and sure made one forget present
worries and fears. It made one momentarily
brave, with the capacity to go over the line and
take on all single handed. This explained the
ferocity of a Russian ground attack, although
the effect on them was slightly dulled as they
were given the stuff routinely.
It was always important to get out of the morgue
as quickly as possible and back to the Command
Post as the second run for the night was out to
the farm house via the field track. This was a
short cut but absolute suicide to use during
daylight so I had to make sure to be back before
dawn otherwise I was faced with a long,
hazardous detour through the town. It wasn't so
much the distance that made the alternate return
route so long but the daylight, and having to
feel my way through the ruins, not knowing what
was waiting around the next corner. Houses or
perhaps whole streets could have changed hands
overnight and there was always the possibility
of being picked off by a sniper's telescopic
sight and end up with a nice little hole between
the eyes.
I never stayed longer than was necessary at the
farm house, just long enough to deliver or pick
up a message and have a quick word then be on my
way again. There was not much comfort there.
Their living quarters were under the floor
boards, and they had no Samakhonka either.
Again, it was a relief to get back to the
familiar surroundings of the Command Post and
relative safety, if one could call it that.
First there were the two dead infantry men. They
had been there now for almost two weeks. Nobody
had shifted them yet and they had gone black and
were terribly bloated and would burst any time.
I exchanged my rifle for one lying beside one of
the bodies which was almost brand new and in
perfect condition - the rifle, not the body! My
rifle wasn't too good anymore. The muzzle was
split and the gun- sight direction pointer was
missing. It had happened the last time I used
the detour through the town, crawling from cover
to cover and was jumped on by a large dog. I
managed to put a bullet into him before he could
savage me but the gun barrel must have been
clogged up with dirt and the bullet split the
muzzle.
Unteroffizier Kahle and his gun crew were holed
up by the mill. Fortunately it wasn't always
necessary to visit him as they were close enough
to contact Headquarters if they needed to so I
delivered only urgent messages. Invariably the
assignment of being a runner was a
heart-thumping experience as it would coincide
with some hefty artillery barrage, when everyone
else was sticking it out in their foxholes.
There was a large fireplace in one wing of the
HQ building which was still in working order
though the room was not. The roof and ceiling
had fallen down, the result of mortar hits and
the few civilians in the basement had been
evacuated to a safer place in town. Stupid as it
was, we kept the fire going, though apart from
getting hot water, it was of no other use as the
smoke was a perfect invitation for mortar crews
to use the chimney for target practice.
Whoever's turn it was to keep the fire going had
to be mighty quick to sling the log on the grate
and get the hell out again before the next
projectile hit the roof, or what was left of it.
One morning it was Bertl's turn. I can't
remember whether his name was Albert or Bertold,
we just called him Bertl. Lately he was keeping
to himself, refusing to answer when spoken to
and just staring with a vacant look in his eyes
from his foxhole and only left it reluctantly
when ordered to go on errand duty. He had grown
very moody, which wasn't surprising. Had we not
been trapped in Kovel Bertl would have been on
his home leave and was going to be married. He'd
told us about it before but now he was not
talking anymore. It was Bertl's last half hour,
and I wonder whether he knew it? He didn't want
to go in to feed the fireplace and only after we
goaded him did he get out of his hole to creep
over to the steps leading up to the entrance,
just five steps. I watched him going up and
disappear through the hole which was once the
proper doorway. Door and frame had long since
been fed to the fire. He had barely got through
the opening when a large shell came whizzing in
with its terrifying screech and crashed on top
of the wing. Its enormous explosion ripped the
entire wall where the fireplace stood and
brought the rest of the building tumbling down
on top of our foxholes which we'd so carefully
dug alongside.
There was a long, heart-rending fearsome scream
and a figure stumbled down the steps, got to his
feet again and staggered across the courtyard
towards the five steps leading to the opposite
wing. He never reached the door. Halfway up the
steps he stood then fell over backwards. The run
across the yard was the superhuman effort of a
dead man. Bertl must have died the very moment
he was hit and by the time I managed to extract
myself from the rubble, it was all over for him.
He lay on the ground with a hole the size of a
fist through his chest where his heart would
have been. Two oversized terrorized eyes stared
into nowhere from his marble-white lifeless face
and there seemed to be not a drop of blood left
in the whole of his body.
The shell that caused poor Bertl's untimely and
violent demise was not one of the usual mortar
grenades but a dreaded 172 mm, the first of a
fierce barrage. They screamed in, one after
another for the next five minutes or so,
crashing and exploding all around us. I wasn't
surprised, therefore, when I was called out to
make contact immediately with Unteroffizier
Kahle's gun at the silo. Being sent out when the
going was toughest, right in the middle of an
artillery barrage was the lot of a miserable
runner...
I waited for the next salvo to subside before
making a dash but hadn't gone very far when
another salvo came hurtling in with a long wild
screech. They seemed to come four at a time,
each one getting closer, as if they knew exactly
where I was lying. Flat on my belly I tried to
shrivel into nothing. A split second after the
impact my hands dug into the frozen ground like
mechanical shovels, eyes closed and face in the
dirt, desperately trying to get a lung full of
air. Then came a deafening explosion when the
earth rose up and I shook with the tremor and
waited for the red hot shrapnel to come hissing
down and cut me to ribbons.
When I finally dared to get up I was amazed to
see my steel helmet lying about a metre or so in
front of me. It had been sucked clean off my
head by the force of the explosion without my
being aware of it. I picked it up and ran, only
to throw myself to the ground again as another
round of shells came roaring in, only this time
not so close as the barrage was veering away
from me. I was still shaking but awfully glad to
still be alive when I reached the Kahle's tower.
There were two chaps manning the gun there, its
barrel pointing in the direction of the
windbreak. I asked them where I could find Kahle
and they pointed to the top of the tower. Then I
enquired why they were pointing their gun at the
wind break. "Tanks" they said, "Ivan put them
there during the night. You can't see them from
down here but they are behind the trees." I
asked what Kahle was doing up the tower and they
said he wanted to send a few shell rounds in
their direction so was having a good look before
starting. "You'll have to go up if you want to
see him" they added.
My job as runner was hazardous enough and I
didn't fancy the climb to Kahle's perch. The top
part was leaning badly to one side and must have
been hit once or twice. But Kahle wouldn't come
down so I'd have to go up. Inside the doorway
one of the crew was crouched by the stairway. It
was a wooden staircase with two landings and an
abrupt end at the second one where a large hole
was ripped in the wall by what must have been a
fairly big shell. From thereon the rest of the
building was leaning. Reaching the first
landing, I could see Kahle on the next, crouched
by the hole and scanning the area around the
wind break with his glasses. He motioned me to
stay where I was and slid away from the hole and
joined me. Then he asked me to creep up and have
a good look for myself.I saw them all right and
didn't need glasses. Mostly Sherman tanks plus
some T34s, charcoal black monsters with the
Russian red star on the turret. Rows and rows of
them. Twenty, fifty, maybe more, I didn't bother
counting. I slid down to Kahle and said I'd
better make my way back to Headquarters and tell
them, but Kahle had something else in mind and
had it all worked out. "No", he said, "you had
better stay with us for a while; I can do with
an extra man". He was going to tackle the job by
remote control, directing the shooting from the
top of the structure. What worried me most was
he kept me up there with him as he needed
somebody at his side to relay his corrections to
the gun crew.
Well, that was the plan. We opened fire and the
grenades found their target though I'm sure very
little damage was done to the tanks' 120mm-thick
armour. Then Kahle was just going to tell me
something when the roof caved in. There was an
awful crash and blinding explosion which lifted
me off my feet and sent me tumbling down some
three or four steps with Kahle falling on top of
me. Debris fell all around us. I thought at
first Kahle had snuffed it but he collected
himself, yelled at me to get out quickly and
bolted down the remaining steps and disappeared
through the door like a hounded rabbit. I raced
after and we both dived into the crews' splinter
pit which was already occupied by Helmut who
wasn't too happy to share his space.
Shell after shell howled in, straight from the
barrels of those tanks and each time they scored
a hit shaking the structure until it came
crashing down in a cloud of dust. We could hear
the tank motors warming up, ready to move out.
Kahle ordered his gun to move away to a more
protected position across the road where a
platoon of infantry was dug in. There was a
short lull in the shelling and he ordered Helmut
and me to stay in the trench while he took off
across the road. He returned soon after with a
Panzerfaust (Bazooka) in each hand. "Let them
come close and don't miss or you will be
squashed in your hole," he told us before
darting back to join his crew. 'Verdammtes
Arschloch'. We didn't say it, but we both had
the same thought.
Actually, he wasn't far wrong with his advice.
The Panzerfaust's effective range was about 30
metres but had the tendency sometimes to stray
badly off target. It was advisable therefore to
let the tank come as close as possible before
losing your nerve and pulling the trigger. It
wasn't long before the first tank's massive
shape loomed through the debris the other side
of the ruined tower. He halted briefly to adjust
his cannon from crash position to a few degrees
above horizontal and then rattled forward on his
chains with a jolting lurch. He came nearer, to
about 20, maybe 15 metres, close enough to get a
good shot at him but it would have been instant
suicide for us to do so as he was closely
followed by the second and third tank.
We watched the near side of the building for any
movement. Any tank coming from there would have
given us no chance as he would run straight over
our foxhole; we decided to save our two Bazookas
for that moment. "We will be dead before long,
anyhow" said Helmut and I had to agree with him
as there was no way we could get out of our hole
and not be seen by the tank crews. I thanked
Kahle for our hopeless position. Had he not kept
me I could be back at Headquarters.
The tanks moved one behind the other in close
formation, allowing less likelihood for any to
run into trouble as each was pretty well covered
by the one behind. They made straight for the
road that would take them past our Command Post
to the town centre. Five, ten, fifteen - there
must have been twenty-five to thirty of those
monsters that rolled past our trench that
morning.
Usually a tank formation of a that size was
covered by infantry protection, either riding
atop the battle cruisers or following closely
behind. But those tanks were on their own, they
didn't expect to run into much opposition. They
knew our predicament probably better than we
did. They knew we had no tanks in the town and
they also knew how short we were on ammunition.
What they didn't know , however, was that there
were a couple of 45 mm anti-tank guns in the
vicinity, well camouflaged and dug in out of
sight, one of them directly opposite our Command
Post.
The last tank rolled past our hole, spitting
red-yellow darts in short erratic bursts from
his machine gun. It was a Sherman and I made
sure it was, indeed, the last one. "I'm getting
this one" I said to Helmut, who kept quiet. I
had to be quick before it reached the road. I
flung the stove-pipe over my shoulder, put the
safety catch to on, lined up my sight with the
tank's turret and pulled the trigger. There was
a mighty flash of flame from the barrel on my
back as the hollow charge arched its way towards
the target then I watched in horror as the
projectile, the size of a 6-inch thick pine-
apple with its metal fins extended, veered
slightly to the left and just clipped the tank's
turret on the outer edge and bounced off without
exploding.
The tank entered the road, its crew unaware of
their good fortune and I guess I was also lucky
that the crew of the tank missed to see the
flame from the Panzerfaust's stovepipe on my
back. He would have headed straight back for our
foxhole, lock one chain on top and with one
complete turn Helmut and I would have been
history, gone forever. I threw the empty sleeve
over the side and turned round to Helmut who was
standing upright with his head resting on the
wall of the trench. I just touched him with my
elbow and he slowly slid sideways and came to
rest in a sitting position, his eyes were wide
open but only the white was staring out.
It had been the narrow width of the trench that
stopped him from falling down in the first
place. Blood trickled from under his helmet. A
stray bullet from the tank's machine gun must
have hit him right under the rim of his helmet,
entering on one side, made a complete U-turn and
came out the other, neatly cutting his skull. I
remembered what he'd said a while before and
he'd been 'dead' right. I dared not remove his
helmet but needed to get help quickly from
Kahle's crew across the road, but first had to
make sure that last tank was not followed by any
latecomers or infantry. It wouldn't make much
difference to Helmut, or probably me, for that
matter. I would have got some of them with my
rifle but their ugly long, square sectioned
bayonets would have finished me off in very
short time.
I heaved myself out of the trench and dashed
across the road. I could still see the back of
the last tank and figured it should be almost
level with one of our anti-tank guns dug in
there. I hoped they would be luckier than I was
with my effort. I found Kahle and his crew
sheltering behind the ruins of a house and
quickly told him what had happened and he got
two of his crew to go with him to get Helmut
out. "Any more tanks coming?" he asked. I said I
didn't know but that I thought we'd watched the
last go by. Then he told me to return to
Headquarters, which I was more than relieved to
do.
I was about halfway back to the Command Post
when there were two explosions in quick
succession up the road. It was that last tank,
whose chains had been ruptured by two mines
cleverly pulled across the road by our infantry
using ropes. In trying to reverse the tank
driver rolled off the broken tracks and
immobilized himself directly in front of our
Command Post. It had suffered no other damage
but was still terribly dangerous as the crew of
five were still inside the steel walls of their
armaments. The tank turret with its big gun was
turning in a full circle, ready to blast away at
the slightest movement. I crouched behind the
ruin of a house, unable to cross the open
stretch that separated me from my foxhole behind
the Command Post.
I was joined by a Feldwebel and his offsider.
They must have had something to do with the mine
pulling act. Those two were carrying a number of
stick hand grenades with them which they got
busy tying into a bundle. 'geballte Ladung'
(concentrated charge), they called it. Then the
Feldwebel started crawling towards the tank with
the bundle. "What's he doing?" I asked his mate.
"He will try to open the hatch for those Ivans
to come out" he replied, adjusting his rifle and
ensuring it was ready for use. "Wants to take a
few prisoners" he added. I looked at the monster
stuck there, his turret still going round.
"He'll have a job to get up that tank". It's
well over 2 metres to the top and hardly any
place to get a foothold," I said. "He knows
that, he has done it before," he replied,
obviously disgusted with my ignorance. His
attitude changed slightly when I mentioned that
all that wouldn't be necessary had I not missed
the wretched thing with my Panzerfaust. "Didn't
aim properly?" he wanted to know. I replied,
"Yes, I had him perfectly in my sight but the
bloody thing veered and bounced off his turret
without going off". "Ah", he grunted, though
brightened up a bit when I complemented him on
the rope job. "You get to know what you are
doing, if you do it often enough" he said, "and,
of course, one must be dead accurate" he added,
giving me a meaningful look.I didn't want to
offend him so I refrained from saying what went
through my mind.
The fact that the tank had rolled off its chains
and churned deeply into the road, almost to the
rear sprocket drivewheel helped the Feldwebel
and he had little trouble getting up to the top
where he placed the bundled grenades, pulled the
detonator and jumped off mighty quickly. The
ensuing explosion ripped the lid off its hinges
and the turret stopped turning. The Feldwebel
got on again, dropped one more grenade through
the narrow opening created by the first
explosion and crouched waiting for the bang.
There was one survivor, the driver. He opened
his forward driver's hatch but didn't come out.
Instead he fired his pistol at the Feldwebel,
but missed him. The Feldwebel did not miss when
he returned the fire. The driver couldn't have
been more than sixteen.
I was glad to be back in my foxhole. I reported
in to the staff sergeant, told him about the
windmill tower and what had happened out there,
and to Helmut in particular. "Unteroffizier
Kahle will bring him in shortly," I said.
Unteroffizier Kahle was later awarded the Iron
Cross First Class for his exploit at the tower.
I was at his side then but didn't get a
mention...
Bertl was still lying there when I got back.
They hadn't had the opportunity to shift him but
would be taking him to the cemetery in the
evening and put him in one of those 'empty
boxes' in the chapel vault I supposed.
Hans, a fellow runner with HQ went out that same
morning on an errand to Wachtmeister Wehrt's
position, but never came back. He came from a
shoemaker's family near Weissenfels and was
fascinated by leather. If he found a dead horse
with a saddle on its back he would bring it back
and cut all the good leather into small bits the
shape of shoe soles which he stored in his
rucksack to take to his parents on his next
leave. The rucksack was still there but Hans
wouldn't be taking it home anymore. I was asked
to include the run out to Wehrt's gun in my
itinerary but never found out what happened to
Hans, except his dog plate turned up at
Headquarters.
Some of the advancing tanks must have run into
trouble, judging from the sound of shooting and
explosions that came from the town square. Our
artillery had surprised them and they lost four
in quick succession to the German field guns. A
105mm shell fired from close quarters goes
through 100mm of steel like a knife through
butter. The other tanks had split up into
smaller groups and were heading in different
directions. Actually their overall success
wasn't very great as by the end of the day most
of them had been picked up and immobilized or
destroyed, either by artillery or by individual
effort like that of the Feldwebel's this
morning.